Positive Parenting Guide – Definition, How To & Examples
The positive parenting approach is a relatively new parenting technique that is grounded in research and supports positive behavior.
Since there are simply so many ways to parent, you could feel flustered or confused about how to go about raising your kids. Each developmental stage comes with its own difficult tasks, but parenting is a task that is both rewarding and draining at the same time.
One benefit of living in the twenty-first century, however, is being able to access a vast amount of information at the tip of your fingers.
This includes a plethora of resources on how to best manage parenting with teenagers, managing behavior issues, and finding ways to boost your child’s self-esteem.
A positive approach to parenting addresses all of these issues and focuses on resilience, happiness, and strength building.
The following article explains how you can start using this approach and the benefits of doing so.
What is Positive Parenting? – Definition & Meaning
Positive parenting seeks to bring out the good in children and focus on raising them for future positive child development.
It involves listening to, caring, teaching, leading, and providing for the child no matter what occurs between you. It is developing an unconditionally loving and supportive bond while encouraging positive behavior.
Parents using the approach are nonviolent and have strong communication skills. The recognition and guidance were given to the child allow them to achieve healthy development, both emotionally, socially, and physically.
This approach allows a child to love themselves and recognize their unique strengths and abilities while maintaining a respectful child/parent relationship.
There is no room for a power struggle in positive parenting, as it is seen as an unhealthy behavior and discouragement. This way, children stay controlled yet motivated and maintain a long-lasting positive mindset.
When the child feels empathy and support from positive parents, they are encouraged and more likely to accomplish goals and succeed later on in life.
Additionally, they may learn to be more emotionally in tune with themselves after being honest with their parents.
The recognition of accomplishments allows children to learn the value of goal orientation as well as increases the odds of academic success and boundaries ensure children do not obtain power over their parents.
What are the Benefits of Positive Parenting? – List of 25 Examples
Effective parenting offers a plethora of benefits. Below is a list of 25 benefits you can obtain when using positive parenting solutions.
- Better adaptability to a school or non-home environment.
- Increased motivation.
- Decreased depressive behaviors and less anxiety.
- Better social skills (people skills) in more developed children.
- Increased self-esteem.
- General positive outcomes among children, such as increased optimism and a positive outlook on the future/life.
- Increased independence and self-efficacy.
- Better cognitive and social development.
- More likely to be honest and open to parents.
- Children feeling more secure and loved in their household.
- Developing social self-efficacy.
- Decreased aggression among children through anger management.
- Controlled attachment among toddlers.
- Reduction in unwanted and unhealthy habits.
- Less likelihood of turning to drugs or alcohol as a teen.
- More developed problem-solving abilities.
- Healthy coping habits.
- Future aspirations and developing a goal-oriented mindset.
- Educational goal development.
- Increased sense of parenting competence and peace of mind.
- A healthy and informed approach to relationships. More likely to listen to family values.
- Decreased family conflicts and stress.
- Less behavioral disorders among children and age-appropriate behavior is often shown.
- Improved resilience in parents and children.
- More compliance and self-regulation.
Positive Parenting Techniques & Solutions
If you are curious about the specific techniques positive parents use, definitely read on.
Below, you will see seven techniques you can start implementing as well as solutions to common problems families experience.
1.) Never reward tantrums. Rather, be calm and gentle, yet firm, with the way you handle outbursts with younger children especially.
2.) Parents may have a barrier preventing them from acting positively. Find and address this barrier.
3.) You may believe positive parenting skills are simply promoting toxic positivity. This is not true, since you must remember to be firm and not reward bad habits yet still express love.
4.) Child health relies heavily on how well you teach them healthy eating, sleeping, and exercise habits. Make health a priority as a positive individual.
5.) Find hobbies and activities you can perform with a child to bond over.
6.) Get to know the people you children are friends with without being intrusive. One way to do this is by speaking with parents while your children play.
7.) Set long-term parenting goals and find methods to keep yourself positive. Achieving your goals can give you a boost as a parent.
30 Examples of Positive Parenting in Action
There are many ways to utilize a positive parenting strategy, and you must tailor your approach to your child’s needs.
However, here are a few examples of positive, attentive parenting in action.
1. Active parenting involves using positive communication with your child. This means being honest and gentle while avoiding sarcasm, criticism, or rudeness and using the authoritative parenting style.
2. A common challenge for parents is allowing children to work out problems in their own. Positive parents encourage kids to work out and talk out their issues, try to solve them independently, but support them if they need assistance.
3. Encourage children to explore their interests by allowing them to safely explore the world around them.
4. Understand your child’s developmental and social needs through supportive parenting and active listening.
5. Offer your child a variety of learning opportunities and learn about their learning style.
6. Attention from parents is crucial in this approach. Pay attention to a child’s signals starting from infancy.
7. Teach your child the value of resilience and persistence.
8. Help your child develop healthfully by showing an interest in their goals, strengths, and interests. Encourage them to pursue their interests (this boosts a child’s self-esteem).
9. Assist the child in learning healthy coping strategies. The strategies should encourage their independence.
10. Positive parenting approaches for parents allow you to listen fully to your child and help them build EQ. Do not dismiss your child’s fears or needs; this is one of the key positive parenting practices.
11. Provide discipline and set expectations, but do not be harsh.
12. If a child displays bad behavior, set consequences. Keep in mind that bad-mouthed parents often see their behavior rub off on their kids, so assess your own language and body language.
13. Play with your child and allow them to express their excitement.
14. Spend time bonding together to create long-lasting memories.
15. Hold family meetings and allow your children to voice their opinions.
16. Supervise your child or adolescent, but also ensure they maintain a level of freedom that is developmentally appropriate.
17. Ensure children are not overexposed to technology. Especially monitor social media, for it can expose them to negative peer relationships.
18. Teach children about appropriate behaviors within families, school, and what healthy online habits look like.
19. Expose your child to positive role models outside of yourself (although you should be a top mentor). This can be anyone from a teacher to a pastor. Positive parenting experts agree this builds resilience and creates an effective support network.
20. Express that you will have unconditional love for your child, no matter which mistakes they make.
21. Give your child choices on which chores they can do if they refuse to follow directions.
22. Challenging children is tricky, but allow kids to struggle for a bit instead of immediately helping them.
23. Show children the benefits of collaboration and help them build social skills.
24. Introduce them to kids around the neighborhood to build positive peer relationships.
25. Validate a child’s identity and desires.
26. Limit your negative self-talk, and correct a child if they speak negatively about themselves.
27. Do not shame your child. If they are shamed at school, teach them that some individuals are negative and this speech is unacceptable. Show support.
28. Use positive reinforcement.
29. Explain the reason you have boundaries and rules to keep your child in the know and make them more likely to accept the rules.
30. Model the behavior you want a child to use yourself.
Positive Parenting Tips for Toddlers
As the parent of a toddler, you understand how chaotic life can get if you do not optimize your parenting.
Luckily, there are a few steps you can take to show supportive parenting to such a young child. Firstly, hazard-proof the house. Ensure there are no dangerous materials in the crib, car seat, or other areas of the home.
Stay committed to ensuring the child is vaccinated. Stimulate the child’s mind by playing or reading to them. Also, expose them to language by consistently speaking to them.
When the toddler engages in positive behavior, react positively. Another engaging activity for positive families is teaching children songs or rhythms.
Positive Parenting Tips for Older Kids (Pre-School & School)
As your children grow up and change, your parenting style will need to adapt as well. Preschoolers’ parents should remain committed to safety.
Check to see if the playground and other frequently visited areas are child-proof. At this time, kids can begin participating in chores and you can set expectations clearer than before.
Additionally, be consistent with your discipline. Since your children are now a bit older, you can start giving them more choices and independence.
During pre-adolescence, supervise a child’s activities online and offline while encouraging healthy habits. Talk to them about the importance of school and other activities.
Do not lose family bonds by having meetings and family activities as often as possible. Once they are a bit older, talk to children about puberty and the importance of avoiding risky behaviors.
Discourage behaviors like sex, drinking, and drugs if they are nearly teens. Ensure they are active, eating healthy, and sleeping well. Once again, increase responsibilities and expectations.
Teach them about money and learn about their friends. Make sure your goals stay clear. Safety remains important, even if your child is 15 or older.
Talk about sex, contraception, curfew, suicidal ideation, and friendship. They are now able to understand more sensitive topics like depression, so speak to them about this. Help them plan ahead for the future.
Now, you can be a bit more hands-off when it comes to technology but teach them about the consequences of overusing it. Respect their need for privacy.
Finally, continue to show them unconditional love and support no matter what occurs during this period of time.
20 Powerful Positive Parenting Quotes
Quotes from positive parenting experts can help you develop a positive mindset learn a bit about someone else’s perspective on positivity.
View the following quotes to get inspired and motivated as a parent.
1. “Motherhood has taught me the meaning of living in the moment and being at peace. Children don’t think about yesterday, and they don’t think about tomorrow. They just exist in the moment.” — Jessalyn Gilsig
2. “There is no such thing as a perfect parent. Just be a real one.” — Sue Atkins
3. “The point of parenting is not to have all the answers before we start out but instead to figure it out on the go as our children grow. Because as they do, so will we.” — Bridgett Miller
4. “Behind every child who believes in himself is a parent who believed in them first.” — Matthew L. Jacobson
5. “By loving them for more than their abilities we show our children they are much more than the sum of their accomplishments.” — Eileen Kennedy-Moore
6. “Your children need to have a cushion to fall on. That cushion is you. That cushion is love.” – Carolina King
7. “The most powerful way to change the world is to live in the front of our children the way we would like the world to be.” —Graham White
8. “One hundred years from now it won’t matter what your bank account was, the sort of house you lived in, or the kind of car you drove, but the world may be different because you were important in the life of a child.” — Forest E. Witcraft
9. “So often, children are punished for being human. They are not allowed to have grumpy moods, bad days, disrespectful tones, or bad attitudes. Yet, we adults have them all the time. None of us are perfect. We must stop holding our children to a higher standard of perfection than we can attain ourselves. ” — Rebecca Eanes
10. “Too much love never spoils children. Children become spoiled when we substitute presents for presence.” — Anthony Withman
11. “If your children fear your, they cannot trust you. If they don’t trust you, they cannot learn from you.” – Lori Petro
12. “Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, first we have to make them feel worse? Think of the last time you felt humiliated or treated unfairly. Did you feel like cooperating or doing better?” – Jane Nelson
13. “Every day, in a hundred small ways our children ask, “Do you hear me? Do you see me? Do I matter” There behavior often reflects our response.” — L.R. Knost
14. “If you can control your behavior when everything around you is out of control, you can model for your children a valuable lesson in patience and understanding…and snap an opportunity to shape up character.” – Jane Clayson Johnson
15. “Adults who are respectful of children are not just modeling a skill or behavior, they are meeting the emotional needs of those children, thereby helping to create the psychological conditions for children to treat others respectfully.” – Alfie Kohn
16. “Don’t let yourself become so concerned with raising a good kid that you forget that you already have one.” – Glennon Melton
17. “To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today.” – Barbare Johnson
18. “Children must never work for our love, they must rest in it.” — Gordon Neufeld
19. “One generation of deeply loving parents would change the brain of the next generation, and with that, the world.” – Charles Raison
20. “Every father should remember that one day his son will follow his example instead of his advice.” — Charles F. Kettering
Frequently Asked Questions About Positive Parenting
Is Positive Parenting Bad?
No, there is no research suggesting that a properly implemented positive parenting approach has adverse effects on children.
On the other hand, significant research has shown the opposite. The fact is positive parenting has beneficial effects on children, such as increasing self-esteem, decreasing negative behaviors, boosting family bonds and social skills, as well as improving long-term goal orientation (1 and 2).
Overall Conclusion For Positive Parenting
Every parent should tailor their parenting approach to the needs and desires of their child.
However, one of the best ways to help a child develop healthfully while maintaining a positive relationship with them is through a positive parenting approach.
Not only will your child become more confident, empathetic, disciplined, and goal-oriented with this approach, but it will also save you time and energy you would otherwise spend on arguing with them or wondering where they are as well as who they are with.
Positive parenting lets kids feel love and accepted, but also keeps parents in control. It gives you peace of mind and makes you a happy parent, especially once you see the result of your parenting over time.
YOU MAY ALSO LIKE