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Identifying Relationship Strengths & Weaknesses Can Make You Both Happier

Being in a relationship is about making the most of the strengths you and your partner have to offer. However, effectively understanding and leveraging those strengths is key. The HIGH5 strengths assessment can provide invaluable insights into your unique strengths profile as an individual and as a couple. With this awareness, you can build on your strengths to enhance communication, appreciation, and all the other hallmarks of a truly fulfilling relationship.

In this article, we will highlight the top relationship strengths that are key to a healthy, happy, and lasting romantic relationship, and we will describe a few relationship weaknesses that might be holding you back. Keep reading to find out more.

10 benefits of having a fulfilling relationship

Why be in a long-term romantic relationship at all? Investing in relationship happiness can provide great rewards. The main benefits of a happy relationship are as follows:

Increased happiness
Greater life satisfaction
Better mental health
Lower rates of psychological distress
Higher levels of positive emotions in response to stressors
More conscientiousness
A greater sense of self-worth
More optimism
More confidence
Less anxiety

The benefits of a fulfilling relationship catalyze a positive cycle of growth and well-being for both partners. One way for couples to gain a deeper understanding of how their individual strengths interact and complement each other is the HIGH5 strengths assessment. This tool allows couples to co-create an environment where both can truly thrive and experience the immense personal and interpersonal benefits that a strong relationship provides.

Pro Tip From HIGH5

Regularly revisit your strengths profiles as your relationship evolves. Recognize how your strengths interactions may need to shift to keep deriving the fullest benefits and positive impacts for each other.

What makes a good relationship?

Healthy relationships promote happiness and mental wellness as well as better physical health. The HIGH5 strengths assessment equips you with powerful self-knowledge to cultivate the very qualities that define a good relationship – mutual respect, support, shared values, and more. With insights into your strengths composition, you can be much more intentional about nurturing the positive relationship dynamics that put your partner’s well-being first. Moreover, people in good and lasting relationships have a better sense of self, more satisfying lives overall, and higher rates of happiness.

Having a high-quality relationship is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Quality relationship-building enhances our sense of self-worth, provides emotional support during difficult times, and allows us to sleep a little easier at night, knowing that we’re not alone.

A good relationship is loving, respectful, and supportive. A great relationship means supporting each other, nourishing a healthy sex life, having a shared sense of values and goals, sharing interests, and being attentive to each others’ needs. Most importantly, a good relationship should put the well-being of your partner before your own wants. In short: do everything you can so they feel loved and happy.

Pro Tip From HIGH5

Look at your combined strengths, identified via HIGH5, through a lens of appreciation – celebrate how your collective strengths enable the qualities of an exceptional relationship. Where there are gaps, commit to developing new strengths to keep growing together.

13 qualities every truly happy relationship has in common

The following are thirteen of the best qualities contributing to a successful, healthy relationship:

Commitment
Trust
Honesty
Loyalty
Openness & Communication
Flexibility & Adaptability
Admiration
Support
Goodwill
Appreciation
Stamina
Determination
Forgiveness

Commitment

Commitment is important because it promises to work on building closeness within the couple in both easy and difficult times. Couples who have a solid commitment to one another are willing to work out their problems instead of pushing them under the rug. They have faith in each other, no matter what life throws at them or how long it takes to resolve conflicts or disagreements.

Pro Tip From HIGH5

Make your strengths assessment results in a conversation starter to build understanding and commitment. Discuss how you can both play to your strengths to overcome challenges and be there for each other through difficult times.

Trust

A relationship cannot survive without trust. Trust comes from knowing that your partner has your best interests at heart, even if it means compromise or sacrifice. Trust also includes knowing that your partner won’t take advantage of you and won’t use your love as a way to hurt you. Trust is built over time as couples share more about themselves, keep promises to each other, and help one another grow into better individual people.

Honesty

Like trust, honesty must be present in the foundation of a relationship. Lying destroys trust and ruins any progress that has been made between couples who are trying to improve their relationship skills and communication techniques. An excellent way to build trust is by telling your partner the truth so they know what’s going on in your life and how to be a part of your experience.

Loyalty

Loyalty is significant for couples in a long-term relationship because it shows that they will stay by each other’s side through thick and thin. A loyal partner is someone who sticks up for their significant other, even if dozens of people try to tear them down. Even when the going gets tough and your partner isn’t feeling 100%, they’ll be there with open arms because your needs always come first. A loyal partner won’t jeopardize the relationship because of outside influences or pressure from others.

Openness & communication

Make sure that you communicate your needs with one another and mention the positive qualities in conversation, or else risk miscommunication and eventually resentment towards one another. Communicating openly with your partner helps build strong relationship skills because you both practice being free to share feelings without fear of judgment or rejection. You and your partner should be able to listen to each other attentively and express yourselves without getting defensive or trying to “one-up” each other’s feelings. An excellent way to communicate with each other is by asking for help when you’re having a bad day, but only do so if you genuinely want their emotional support.

Flexibility & adaptability

For a relationship to have long-term success, both partners need to be equally flexible and adaptable. This includes doing things like being willing to change the plans you had previously made while considering your partner’s needs and wants so they feel included in the decision process. For example, if one partner wants to go out with friends on Saturday night, but the other person wants to stay in and have a quiet night as a couple. Relational flexibility would mean discussing the options of staying home to spend time with your partner or going out with friends, either separately or with your partner.

Adaptability is being willing to compromise and adjust expectations so both parties are happy with the final solution. This might involve doing something you don’t want to do but makes your partner happy or vice versa.

Admiration

It’s important to communicate frequently to your significant other what you appreciate about them because this shows that you recognize their positive qualities and what makes them unique as individuals. Sometimes, admiration may express itself in words, but it will also be shown through actions. This is because couples who genuinely care about each other make sacrifices without asking for anything in return. Admiration allows you to appreciate everything your significant other brings to the table and encourages you both to be the best versions of yourselves.

Support

Support is vital in human relationships because it shows that you’re willing to help your significant other through tough times, even when they aren’t at their best. Couples who support one another are more likely to maintain healthy relationships because showing mutual support builds a growing experience of togetherness. Support doesn’t always require a lot of effort either; a listening ear goes a long way and can provide so much value to someone going through a hard time. When it comes to being there for your partner, every little bit can make a positive impact.

Goodwill

Having goodwill towards your partner means consistently approaching them with unconditional positive regard, or always giving them the benefit of the doubt. The concept of unconditional positive regard was developed in the 1950s by American psychologist Carl Rogers (1). Bringing this mindset to your relationship will encourage both you and your partner to view each other as teammates rather than being each other’s main source of conflict. Goodwill also prevents the relationship from being poisoned with contempt.

Appreciation

Because it’s essential that couples feel heard and understood by each other, couples who show appreciation towards each other are more likely to maintain healthy relationships. Acts of appreciation, like writing a gratitude list about your partner and sharing it with them, build a couple’s bond by demonstrating that person’s unique value in the relationship. Making your partner feel seen and heard through acts of appreciation is a powerful way to grow in closeness and relationship satisfaction.

Stamina

Stamina is the ability to endure high-stress levels over a long period of time. It has many unique benefits that improve health and performance in not just athletics and works but in your couples as well. The higher your overall stamina, the more you’re able to get out of life, mentally and physically as well as emotionally. Stamina also plays an important role in other vital relationship qualities like commitment, loyalty, and support.

Determination

Determination means pushing yourself past your comfort zone by taking calculated risks to do what you think is right. Determination is a key factor in so many aspects of living life successfully. Practicing this quality in your relationship is a great way to help you reach your shared goals, no matter how difficult they may seem at the outset. Determination also strengthens a couple’s adaptability, because it shows an acceptance that sometimes the only way forward is by taking chances and trying something new.

Forgiveness

Forgiving someone who has hurt you isn’t easy (and sometimes not possible). However, just like a broken bone often heals to be stronger at the break, when forgiveness can take place between a couple, that couple’s bond becomes stronger. The Gottman Institute, a well-known resource for relationship health, has found that couples in satisfying, lasting relationships are skilled at both requesting and offering forgiveness (2).

10 strengths in a relationship

Strong communication
Mutual respect for each other’s thoughts and opinions
Supportive of both their respective dreams
Vibrant knowledge of one another’s family dynamics
Good listening skills
Excellence at collaborative problem-solving
Interest in one another’s hobbies
Responsibility and financial stability
Intimate communication
Respect for one another’s personal space

Pro Tip From HIGH5

Identify which of the strengths listed come most naturally to each partner using the HIGH5 assessment. Then be purposeful about leveraging those intrinsic strengths, while supporting growth in areas that are relatively weaker strengths for one or both individuals.

10 weaknesses in a relationship

No drive to learn new things together
No commitment to the cause of each other’s happiness
Neglect in planning romantic dates, vacations, etc.
Being unsupportive of one another’s interests
Lack of intimacy in physical nature or verbal expression
Lack of passion for life outside their relationship
Inability or unwillingness to manage respective finances efficiently and responsibly
Having no concept of personal space; can’t keep one another at arm’s length when needed
Inability to communicate effectively when the going gets tough
Inconsistent life goals and aspirations

Strengths in a relationship FAQ

What are good strengths in a relationship?

Strengths in a relationship are the beneficial characteristics of the people who make up that couple. Strengths can be anything like patience, forgiveness, honesty, love, and so much more. Relationship strengths have the power to get through thick and thin together. Even if one member of the couple is not good at something, the other’s strengths might prove enough to fill in any gaps that might keep the couple from growing closer. A couple that has such positive characteristics is more likely to have a longer-term, more satisfying relationship.

What are the five most important things in a relationship?

According to the Gottman Institute, the two qualities that make the strongest “pillars” of a relationship are trust and commitment (3). A relationship where both of these qualities are shared in equal parts by both partners has a greater chance of not just withstanding but also growing stronger through shared sorrows and joys.

What are the three main qualities of love?

Social psychologist Theresa E. DiDonato describes the three core qualities of true love as responsiveness, authentic connection, and stability(4). Each of these qualities is at the core of many of the relationship strengths listed above. For instance, responsiveness is the quality of being in tune with one’s partner, a quality that plays out through openness & communication, flexibility & adaptation, and forgiveness.

What is the biggest strength of a couple?

When both members of a couple are willing to request and receive forgiveness, that couple is able to better withstand the inevitable mistakes they make while continuing to grow in closeness (2). All couples fight, but not everyone learns from their mistakes. Those couples who are willing to discover better ways to love each other after misunderstandings and hurt are better poised to stay together longer. When a couple is willing to forgive without holding grudges, that couple is then free to move even more toward emotional intimacy. It is important, however, that while one partner may have the responsibility of letting go of a grudge, the offending partner has the responsibility of following through with the strength of goodwill in order to love the hurt partner in the way they need to feel loved.

How can I find out what my strengths in love are?

Bringing your best qualities to your relationship is a great way to show your partner that you want the best for them. It’s also a way to grow in your own self-esteem and self-respect. The HIGH5 strengths assessment can help you discover your unique strengths so you can make the most of where you already shine. Taking the HIGH5 strengths assessment as a couple can also provide you with a better understanding of each other as well as the unique dynamics that have the power to keep the flame of your love burning strong without burning out.