While emotional abuse is never the victim’s fault, low self-esteem can be a common side effect.
Having low self-esteem can make you feel powerless and stuck in an abusive relationship.
You may also find it difficult to leave the relationship, as you doubt your ability to take care of yourself.
If you feel like you’re in this position, it’s important to take steps to improve your self-esteem.
In this article, we will explore the signs of low self-esteem and offer some tips on how you can start to build it.
Keep reading to find out more.
What is Low Self-Esteem?
Low self-esteem is a feeling of not being good enough, or unworthy of love and respect.
People with low self-esteem often have negative thoughts about themselves and their abilities. This can lead to a lot of emotional pain and make it difficult to enjoy life.
Low self-esteem can be caused by many things, including emotional abuse.
If you have been in an abusive relationship, it’s important to address the root cause of your low self-esteem.
This will require some work on your part, but it is possible to heal your esteem and move on from the abuse.
13 Signs of Low Self-Esteem
Poor Confidence
Having poor confidence is one of the key signs of low self-esteem.
People with low self-esteem often doubt their abilities and feel like they are not good enough. They may shy away from challenges and avoid taking risks, as they fear failure.
If you have poor confidence, it’s important to start building your self-esteem.
Challenge yourself to do things that scare you and gradually increase how far your comfort zone reaches.
Remember that you are capable of achieving great things, regardless of what you currently think about yourself
Negative Social Comparison
People with low self-esteem often compare themselves negatively to others. They may feel like they are not as good-looking, talented, or successful as other people.
This can lead to a lot of unhappiness and insecurity.
If you find yourself engaging in negative social comparison, it’s important to stop. Instead, focus on your strengths and achievements.
Remember that everyone is different and that there is no such thing as a perfect person. You are unique and special, just the way you are.
Trouble Accepting Positive Feedback
People with low self-esteem often have trouble accepting compliments or positive feedback. They may dismiss the compliment or feel like they don’t deserve it.
This can be due to the negative thoughts they have about themselves.
If you have difficulty accepting compliments, start by acknowledging them. Say thank you and accept the compliment graciously.
Try to remember that the person who said it is being genuine and likely has good intentions. Over time, you will start to believe the compliments yourself.
Lack of Control
People with low self-esteem often feel like they are not in control of their lives. They may feel like they are at the mercy of others and that they have no power or say in what happens.
This can be a result of emotional abuse, as abusers often try to control their victims.
If you feel like you have no control over your life, it’s important to start taking steps to regain control.
Make a list of things that are important to you and start working towards your goals.
Remember that you are in charge of your own life and you have the power to create the life you want.
Worry and Self-Doubt
People with low self-esteem often worry a lot and have a lot of self-doubts. They may doubt their abilities and feel like they are not good enough. This can lead to a lot of stress and anxiety.
If you find yourself worrying a lot, it’s important to learn how to deal with your anxiety. Make time for relaxation and stress-relieving activities.
Practice positive thinking and remind yourself that you can handle whatever comes your way. You are strong and capable, regardless of what you think about yourself.
Perfectionism
People with low self-esteem often strive for perfectionism. They want everything to be perfect, as they believe this is the only way they will be accepted by others.
This can lead to a lot of stress and frustration, as perfectionism is impossible to achieve.
If you are a perfectionist, it’s important to learn how to let go. Accept that perfectionism is an impossible standard and that mistakes are part of life.
Learn to forgive yourself and move on. Remember that you are human and you are allowed to make mistakes.
Insecurity
People with low self-esteem often have a lot of insecurity. They may feel like they are not good enough or that they are not worth anything. This can lead to a lot of loneliness and isolation.
If you feel insecure, it’s important to start accepting yourself for who you are. Make a list of your positive qualities and focus on your strengths.
Spend time with supportive people who will make you feel good about yourself. Over time, you will start to believe the things that they say about you.
Loneliness
People with low self-esteem often feel lonely and isolated. They may feel like they are not good enough to be around others and that they don’t deserve friends.
This can lead to a lot of loneliness and sadness.
If you feel lonely, it’s important to reach out to others. Join a club or group that interests you, or start your social group.
Spend time with supportive people who make you feel good about yourself. Over time, you will start to make new friends and connect with others.
Anxiety and Depression
People with low self-esteem often suffer from anxiety and depression. They may feel like they are not good enough or that they are not worth anything.
This can lead to a lot of stress and sadness.
If you suffer from anxiety or depression, it’s important to get help. Seek professional help from a therapist or counselor.
Low Self-Worth
People with low self-esteem often have a low opinion of themselves.
They may feel like they are not good enough or that they are not worth anything.
Excessive Shame
People with low self-esteem often feel a lot of shame.
This can lead to a lot of isolation and loneliness.
Submissiveness
People with low self-esteem often have a submissive personality. They may feel like they are not good enough to be their person and that they need to defer to others.
This can lead to a lot of stress and frustration.
If you feel submissive, it’s important to start standing up for yourself. Speak up for what you want and need. Be your person and don’t let others walk all over you.
Stand up for your beliefs and don’t be afraid to voice your opinions.
Escapism
People with low self-esteem often turn to escapism as a way to cope with their feelings.
They may engage in activities like drugs, alcohol, gambling, or sex as a way to forget about their problems.
If you engage in escapist activities, it’s important to seek help. Talk to someone about your feelings and why you are using these activities to escape.
Find healthy ways to deal with your emotions and learn how to cope with stress and sadness. Get involved in activities that make you happy and help you relax.
Over time, you will find that you no longer need to rely on escapist activities to feel good about yourself.
Dangerous Sides Effects of Having Low Self-Esteem
There could be some dangerous side effects to having low self-esteem permanently.
Here are some of the most common ones:
- Anxiety
- Eating disorders
- Emotional distress
- Panic disorder
- Risky behaviors
- Stress
How To Overcome Low Self-Esteem
If you are struggling with low self-esteem, there are ways that you can overcome it.
Below are a few tips.
Care for Yourself
People with low self-esteem often don’t take care of themselves. They may not eat healthy foods or get enough exercise.
They may also not get enough sleep or take time for relaxation.
If you want to overcome your low self-esteem, it’s important to start taking care of yourself.
Eat healthy foods, get enough exercise, and get plenty of rest. Take time for relaxation and stress-relieving activities.
Make sure that you are putting your needs first and that you are taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally, and physically.
Get Some Outside Support
People with low self-esteem often don’t have a lot of supportive people in their lives. This can lead to a lot of loneliness and isolation.
If you want to overcome your low self-esteem, it’s important to start seeking out support from others.
Join a support group or talk to someone who can listen to you and offer helpful advice.
Challenge Negative Thoughts
People with low self-esteem often have negative thoughts about themselves. They may think that they are not good enough or that they are not worthy of anything.
If you want to overcome your low self-esteem, it’s important to start challenging these negative thoughts.
Write down your negative thoughts and then refute them with evidence to the contrary.
Talk to a therapist or counselor who can help you challenge and change your negative thoughts.
Focus on Your Strengths
People with low self-esteem often focus on their weaknesses. They may think that they are not good at anything or that they are not worth anything.
If you want to overcome your low self-esteem, it’s important to start focusing on your strengths. Make a list of your positive qualities and focus on your strengths.
Don’t dwell on your weaknesses – everyone has them. Instead, focus on what you are good at and what makes you unique.
How to Build Self-Esteem
If you want to build self-esteem, know that it’s a process that takes time and effort but with some work, you can do it.
Here are a few tips.
Notice Your Thoughts
One way to boost your self-esteem is to start paying attention to your thoughts. Notice the things that you say to yourself in your head.
Are they positive or negative? If they are negative, work on replacing them with more positive thoughts.
For example, if you catch yourself thinking “I’m so stupid”, try to replace that thought with something like “ I made a mistake, but I can learn from it.”
This may be difficult at first, but with practice, you will be able to change your negative thoughts into positive ones.
Forgive Yourself
Another way to boost your self-esteem is to forgive yourself for your mistakes. We all make mistakes – that’s part of being human.
But, we often beat ourselves up over them and that can lower our self-esteem.
Forgive yourself for your mistakes and move on. Don’t dwell on them or let them bring you down. Learn from your mistakes and then let them go.
Practice Self-Acceptance
If you want to boost your self-esteem, you need to learn to accept yourself for who you are. You are not perfect and that’s okay. You have flaws and that’s okay too.
Start by accepting yourself the way that you are right now. Don’t try to be someone else or change who you are. Just accept yourself for who you are.
Once you start to accept yourself, you will start to feel better about yourself.
Value Yourself
If you want to boost your self-esteem, you need to start valuing yourself. Don’t put yourself down or think that you are not worth anything. Start thinking of yourself as a valuable person.
Think about the things that make you unique and special. You have talents and strengths that nobody else has.
Value those things and think of yourself as someone worth something. When you start to value yourself, you will start to feel better about yourself.
Bonus: How To Help Someone With Low Self-Esteem
Encourage Them
One of the best things that you can do for someone with low self-esteem is to encourage them. Encourage them to stay positive and to focus on their strengths.
Encourage them to keep trying and never give up.
Show Them Compassion
When someone has low self-esteem, they often feel down and worthless. Show them compassion and understand that they are going through a tough time.
Let them know that you support them and care about them.
Knowing the strengths that those that struggle with low self-esteem possess is the first step in helping them build a foundation to esteem themselves by.
These strengths can be used as tools to supplement the love and support of family, friends, and others in their lives that want to see these individuals succeed.
Additionally, these strengths should be embraced as they offer a unique perspective that should be shared with the world.
Acknowledge these strengths and use them to help make the other person’s journey a little bit easier.
Guiding them to tests such as High5test.com can help them see how they rank in different categories that they may feel insecure about.
This information can be used to spark productive conversations about low self-esteem and ways to work on building it up.
Frequently Asked Questions About Low Self-Esteem
What keeps low self-esteem going?
There can be several things that keep low self-esteem going. For some people, it might be a belief that they are not good enough or that they will never be good enough.
For others, low self-esteem may be based on a feeling of shame or humiliation about oneself.
Finally, for some people, low self-esteem may just become a habit – something that they have always done and something difficult to change.
What are the characteristics of a man with low self-esteem?
Men with low self-esteem often have a lot of negative thoughts about themselves.
They may feel like they are not good enough, that they are not worth anything, or that they are not capable of doing anything well.
As a result, men with low self-esteem often have low self-worth and a lack of confidence in themselves. They may also be very critical of themselves and be very hard on themselves.
In addition, men with low self-esteem often have difficulty dealing with stress and may struggle to cope with difficult situations.
What are the characteristics of a woman with low self-esteem?
Women with low self-esteem often have a lot of negative thoughts about themselves as well.
However, their negative thoughts may be more focused on their appearance or their abilities than on their character or worth.
As a result, women with low self-esteem often have low self-worth and a lack of confidence in themselves.
They may also be very critical of themselves and be very hard on themselves.
In addition, women with low self-esteem often have difficulty dealing with stress and may struggle to cope with difficult situations.
How do you fix low self-esteem?
There is no one “fix” for low self-esteem. However, there are several things that can help to improve it:
- Understand what keeps your self-esteem low and what triggers your negative thoughts about yourself.
- Focus on building up your self-confidence
- Practice stress-relieving techniques such as relaxation or mindfulness exercises
